The Perfect Relationship

I love him because I hardly see him. Most of our relationship exists inside my head, where his is magically the ideal dude. In these fantasies, he is an awesome conversationalist (although I am the one inventing all our conversations). He is the best at sex (in real life, he still has a lot to learn). Also in my head, he anticipates my needs, making me crazy happy. In reality, our relationship is nearly nonexistent, a thin frayed string of tiny little encounters that leave me wanting more. The truth is that if I really had him, if he were one hundred percent there, I might be utterly bored. I would also realize that he farts, burps, and sometimes even stinks, like everyone else.